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Chapter 12:
How To Get Women To Sleep With You
You have probably heard the saying
"Mind over matter" – which means if you believe you will succeed
then you are more likely to succeed. So, you need to
think about what you want and how you are going to get it.
Obviously, you want to get an attractive woman into bed. To do this,
you need to figure out what a woman is looking for in a man before
she’ll go to bed with him. If you asked a woman what would
get her into bed, she would deny that such a thing, method, or
technique existed. But as a man with the knowledge, I’m here to
share it! This chapter will reveal techniques for getting a woman to
sleep with you.
Throughout this entire book, and
especially Chapter 3 What Women Want, you have learned
different ways to impress a woman. A woman who responds to your
flirting will likely respond to your sexual advances as well.
Believe it or not, women are looking for sex, too – you just need to
let them play the game with you. Let a woman think
that she is leading the chase. Women like control just as much as
men do, so you have to go along with her. Let her decide she wants
to go to bed with you, and she will be more willing to sleep with
you. Give her what she wants, and she’ll return the favor.
Build Anticipation
It’s a well-known fact that women
take longer to get "in the mood" than men do. A stiff breeze will do
it for a guy who is eager for action! But women need more attention,
more lead-time. You need to hint to her that you are interested in
taking your relationship to the next level, and let her know you
think she’s sexy and attractive. Show her lots of attention, and be
very touchy-feely with her. By giving a woman these reassurances you
make sure that she’s going to stick around and give you what you
want in return.
A great way to woo a woman, and to
lead her to the bedroom, is to surprise her with romance. This is
especially effective if you don’t spoil her – then she will
appreciate it even more. When you surprise a woman with romance, she
feels flattered and appreciated. When a woman feels appreciated she
is more responsive to sexual advances.
Reassure Her
There are a few main fears that hold
a woman back in a new relationship. These fears are also a key for
you to use to unlock a woman’s defensive feelings. If you understand
what these fears are, and you express your knowledge of them to a
woman, she will feel more secure being with you. Read this section
to gain an understanding into a woman’s hesitations to going to bed
with a man. You can alleviate her fear and anxiety and it will make
the transition into the bedroom more natural.
Ease a woman’s
fears and you will
better your chances for success.
- Am I sexy enough?
- Am I good-looking enough?
Many women worry that they aren’t
pretty enough, or sexy enough. This low self-esteem issue is
engrained into women from the day they are born. Women are
subjected to "perfect" models everyday in magazines,
advertisements, and TV. It’s no surprise many women have a
complex. They worry about their size, weight, shape, skin,
imperfections, their clothes, their hair, everything! As men, we
don’t usually understand that a woman needs reassurance to feel
good about her self. To make her feel more attractive around
you, tell her what you love about her. Compliment her on her
eyes, her skin, her waist (granted she has a nice one), her soft
skin, or her hands or nails. You should avoid mentioning her
breasts, though, unless you absolutely love them. Women have a
way of taking any comment and turning into a negative one. Women
are especially paranoid about their breast size and shape when
they are getting undressed with a new guy. So, if you can’t say
anything genuinely nice, then don’t say anything.
- Will he use protection?
This is a fear you should share,
actually. There is always the risk of pregnancy and STDs when
you have sex with a woman. Use a condom. Every time.
NO GLOVE, NO LOVE!
COVER YOUR STUMP
BEFORE YOU HUMP!
DON'T BE SILLY,
PROTECT YOUR WILLY!
USE A CONDOM!
GET IT?
In this day and age, there is the
also the fear of the AIDS virus. It is incurable right now. You
don’t want to get infected with HIV just because you refused to
wear a condom. You should go out and buy new condoms, even
before the expiry date, to ensure freshness. Many women will
actually refuse to sleep with you if you don’t wear a condom.
This is not a rejection towards you; it is a rejection to her
exposure to the unknown. It is safe and good practice to
always wear a condom. If the woman you are with is easy to
talk to, you should bring up the issue of wearing a condom
before the actual moment arises. This will not only put her at
ease, it will let her know it’s important to you. Her best
interests as well as yours are being protected.
- Will he leave me?
Women get tied in emotionally when
they enter the bedroom. Women tend to worry more than men do about
what will happen after sex. It is common for a woman to think that a
guy will use her and leave her. You need to recognize that she might
be feeling this way, so reassure her that you aren’t going anywhere.
Let her know she can count on you for support and reassurance when
she needs it. It is effective to talk about something in the future
that involves the two of you being together. Not marriage, of
course, but maybe a concert event, or plans for a few weeks away.
Remind her that you are there because you want to be, and that you
like her enough to spend your time with her.
Use Subliminal Messages
You want a woman to think about sex,
especially when she is with you. There is something to be said for
subliminal messages. Plan your dialogue to reflect your sexual
desires. Use vocabulary that is associated with feelings and
sensations related to sex. For example, use words such as ‘hot’,
‘passionate’, or ‘delicious’ to describe a pasta dish or the colors
in her apartment. Use the word ‘climax’ when discussing a movie or
music. You can use the power of suggestion to create sexual feelings
within a woman’s subconscious. Try to use words that you know she
will associate with feelings of sexual desire.
By using sexual language you can
put a woman into a receptive state of mind, she will actually think
of and visualize having sex with you. Be careful not to be
obvious or offensive when interjecting suggestive words or phrases.
If you are going to actually discuss sex, you should be sure not to
assume you’ll be having sex with this woman. Start off by talking
about something sexual you might come across - the hot, steamy scene
in a movie you are watching, or an article in a magazine you have
read. Open up her mind to the idea of sex. Using this technique
effectively will work magic the next time you are trying to persuade
a woman into bed.
When and How to Kiss
Kissing is often under-rated by men.
However, women consider kissing a key factor to getting her into
bed. Kissing a woman heightens her physical response to smell,
taste, and touch. When you kiss a woman you aren’t just getting her
to kiss you back, you are getting her physically ready to have sex.
This is especially true for women who have experienced great sex.
Her body knows what could be in store, and the sexual expectation
makes her want to sleep with you even more!
Knowing when to make your move is
very important. You don’t want her to reject you, and you don’t want
to have an uncomfortable moment if you try to kiss her lips and she
turns her head. A really good indication that a woman is ready to be
kissed is if she looks right into your eyes, without saying
anything. She will look expectantly at you, and she’ll smile. If she
remains silent, and holds her gaze, then you know it’s time to plant
your lips on hers.
To start kissing a
woman,
you simply have to initiate a kiss on her lips.
A woman’s response will create the
natural interaction that makes kissing so exciting. The first kiss
might not be smooth and natural, but don’t let it stop you from
proceeding with your persuasion. Kiss her cheeks, her neck, and her
collarbone. Put your hand on her lower cheek and look into her eyes.
Kiss her softly at first, to build the sexual energy between you.
Excite her, and
yourself,
with the anticipation of more.
When you are kissing a woman, be sure
to match her style of kissing. You don’t want to push your tongue
down her throat if she is interlocking lips. When your kisses start
getting longer, then you can start French kissing with small, short
tongue movements into her mouth. Once she follows your lead, and
responds with tongue movements of her own, you can get more
passionate. The intensity of her kissing will also indicate her
interest in getting more physical than you are already. To keep
the mood romantic and sexual, be sure to keep your kisses
slobber-free, and avoid bad breath. Have a mint or gum after
dinner if you need to.
By kissing a woman, you identify that
you are in a relationship with her. It tells her that you want to be
with her, which gives her a sense of security. This is an important
step towards moving your relationship into the bedroom. She will be
more willing to become intimate with you if she feels safe and
secure with you.
Pick Up On Her Cues
With all this talk about ways for men
to imply sexual desire, we should mention that women often do the
same.
Women use methods
of suggestion that are different from ours, so men often don’t pick
up on them.
Women seem to have a sixth sense when
it comes to sex. They know – they can feel – when the time is
right to take a relationship to the next level. If you can pick up
on her interest to go to bed with you then you are more perceptive
than most men. Often, men lose out on opportunities to get laid
because they don’t know when to make their move. You can look for
her signals as invitations to advance sexually. Observe how she acts
physically around you. The list below contains signals to help you
determine when the time is right.
-
- If she sits, stands, and/or
walks very near to you.
- She wants to kiss you a lot.
- She talks about sex – either in
general, or specifically about having sex with you.
- She invites you into her
apartment, or she invites herself into yours, at the end of a
date.
- She sets the mood for sex –
lighting, music, and candles.
- She cuddles with you during a
movie, or while hanging out on the couch.
- She hints about being able to
spend more time with you – maybe she has a day off, or she looks
forward to the weekend.
- She kisses you deeply and
passionately and doesn’t end the kissing.
These cues are all intended to let
you know that she is ready to become more intimate with you. Keep
these things in mind when you go out with a woman to see if you can
pick up on her subtle communications. Once you can read her signals,
you will always know the right time to kiss her, to undress her, and
to take her to bed.
The Morning After
A woman will become more vulnerable
once you have sex with her, so it is important for you to show her
respect. When women go to bed, they take their emotions with them.
Be sure to reassure her emotionally. Tell her you had a really good
time with her, and that you can’t wait for the next sleepover. Offer
her breakfast, or if you have no other obligations, suggest you
spend the morning (and afternoon?) in bed. This will give the woman
you are with confidence that you want to keep seeing her. She will
know that you aren’t going anywhere. By offering reassurance, you
show her that this relationship means something to you, and she
knows it is heading in the right direction.
Authors Final Word
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